About Leanne

Welcome to The Little Blog of Balance.  This space has been created to share things I am excited about, experiences I have had, things I have learned and yearn to share and things I am currently in the process of uncovering.

My name is Leanne, and I’m not a doctor or a scientist.  I am a human being experiencing life.  I am a reader, an analyzer, and a lover of “why?”.

I love the healing arts.  The power of music connects me.  I am awe inspired by the impact of language.  Technology moves me to take things apart and find new ways of being.  I have been personally changed by the practice of meditation and emotionally and physically altered by traditional yoga.  I love research, science, quantum physics, subtle energies, and the life lessons and support offered from and within nature.

The Little blog of Balance was created to serve not only others but myself as well.  If you want to read more about the Little Blog of Balance, you will find more details here.

Balance is something that I had never quite been able to integrate into my life let alone ever thought it was important.

That is until September 2013!

It was at this time I started to lose the strength in my right side.  In fact, all sorts of weird things started happening all rooted in the right side.  I couldn’t lift my arm very well.  I was losing my balance often.  I found it very difficult to breathe.  I was so tired I couldn’t sit at my desk for longer than 10 minutes without having to lie down.  But, I kept pushing myself.  I owned my own company and was a co-founder of another company, and I didn’t have time for this to be happening.

I would work for 10 minutes and then lay down for 20.  I figured out how to lay on the floor and utilize my iPad while on my back so I could work.  In my typical approach to life, I began to “will” myself to get better, mentally.  That didn’t work.

I became allergic to everything that touched my skin and most everything I called food.  I would get a scrape, put on a band-aid and for the first time I had a band-aid allergy.  I started going to doctors to try to figure out what was wrong.  After months they diagnosed Thoracic outlet syndrome.  This is a link to a post I wrote about in 2013. Their recommendation?  Surgery.  They wanted to remove the top rib and cut the scalenes in my neck to make room for the Thoracic nerve bundle.  Ummm…. NO!

The doctors were convinced that the immune reaction was stress in my body and one female Dr. told me “Well, women can get emotional, and then symptoms present themselves because we sometimes let our emotions get the best of us.”  I knew instinctively that the Thoracic outlet syndrome was not the cause of my immune system breaking down AND that swollen lymph nodes, rashes, fevers, and allergies were not because I was too emotional.

One day my acupuncturist had said to me, “you, always green, green, green! You need more yellow and more red!”  He was, of course, referring to a street signal.  By January 2014 I decided I would learn to meditate.  I was open to trying anything at this point.

I won’t delve into that too deeply here as I have writings I will share from that time period (and link to them here).  I will say, the first 2 minutes on that first day, sitting in silence were excruciating.  And that is putting it mildly.  What ended up happening after a commitment to NOT having surgery is I decided to stick with “trying” meditation.

And it changed my life.

At first, the changes were subtle. But, I slowly began a journey into discovering balance (although this is not what I called it at the time).  It was more of a life experiment.  An unraveling what had come before.

It is often said that the hardest moments in life provide the biggest leaps in personal growth and this has been my experience.  They are the times we desperately reach out for something…anything…and along the way, we discover it was inside of us all along.

In the center of our personal existence there resides that space we often forget.  It’s called our heart.

And finally, I want to offer deep gratitude to my dear friend Alex who lovingly and unconditionally nudged me to begin.

 

Onwards,

Leanne